Pay The Fucking Teachers – a rant

By Wes Borg | Published June 26, 2014 by My Dumb Blog

A rare (I promise) and unsolicited rant from this particular comedian:
Pay the fucking teachers. Shut the fuck up and pay them a lot of money.
Don’t hesitate. Don’t argue. Just suck it up and give the fucking teachers whatever they fucking want.
An educated public commits less crime, makes more money, and has a lower birth rate. They probably even fucking swear less often.
Education is the magic fucking bullet to get us out of the economic, political and environmental shitstorm we are about to be swimming in.
Education is not just the magic fucking bullet, it’s our ONLY fucking bullet.
There are currently 7 billion people on this planet.
In the year 2000, there were 6 billion.
That’s a BILLION extra people since Destiny’s Child was a thing.
Wrap your fucking mind around that one.
During Beyoncé’s career, from “Bootylicious” to “Drunk in Love”, the world’s population increased by over 16%. (Don’t blame Beyoncé, she’s just trying to entertain the nice people with her music and titties.)
Oh, and the oceans are about to start rising, flooding cities and wiping out entire fucking islands over the next 50 years. It’s going to happen, and we have NO IDEA how to even just SLOW IT DOWN.
So we are about to have way too many people living on less and less land.
How the FUCK do you think that’s gonna work out?!
Oh, and we’re almost out of oil.
Now obviously “the rich are going to move to the higher ground” (Geoff Berner) and start shooting anyone who comes near the compound, and religious fanatics are going to say it’s God’s Will or some other stupid shit, but the only hope for the rest of us is that the kids growing up today get fucking smart, fucking fast.
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